1. |
I Can't Believe (Intro)
01:53
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2. |
I.C.B.Y.S.F.W.M.
03:25
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I used to get along with my friends //
You probably didn’t expect that //
When I started taking shit out on them //
Now we don’t talk as much //
And I don’t think I’ve seen them in a couple months //
Maybe it’s for the best //
They’re probably less stressed out // I know I wasn’t the easiest to digest //
Have you ever wanted //
To close your eyes //
And let your car drift into the passing traffics headlights //
Because my head’s been filled up //
With clouds and smoke //
And I want to clear it out //
Before I choke it down //
And I can’t remember the last time //
That I took a breath //
Without feeling I deserved anything less than what I laid out for myself //
But it’s not the same now //
As it was back then //
Back when I could appreciate my friends // And after all this // I can’t believe you’re still friends with me //
Have you ever wanted // to close your eyes //
And let your car drift into the passing traffics headlights //
Because my head’s been filled up //
With clouds and smoke //
And I want to clear it out //
Before I choke it down //
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3. |
Dare
03:04
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Talk me down //
There’s a reason why //
I’d rather have my feet planted on the floor //
And when I walk in // Everybody’s staring straight through the door//
I never thought that I could feel so uptight //
In a room full of people //
They could see the whites of my eyes //
The center of attention finds //
A little place between fucked up and I’m alright //
Obi tells me to calm down //
You know you’re the only one that things //
Everyone is watching you but //
It’s getting harder to breathe now //
And it’s like I’m snowballing and I can’t stop myself//
Fuck this I want to go home and be far away from this //
Oddly specific type of lack of self-confidence //
But every signal in my brain //
Is telling me to stay //
I guess I’m loyal to a fault //
So beat me down into the asphalt //
Fuck this I want to go home //
Fuck this I want to go home //
Fuck this I want to go home //
Fuck this I want to go home //
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4. |
Bird Funeral
02:55
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Do you think that I could be //
Someone that you could be proud of //
Because I’ve been absolutely terrified //
To admit I don’t sleep some nights //
Now I’ve been living in a slow hell //
Promise that you won’t tell //
Anyone where I’ve been the last few months //
And I’ve been talking down to my friends //
Almost every weekend //
And I don’t think that I’ll ever fuck this up //
Now I’m ignoring all my interests //
Revelry and progress //
How long do you think I can keep this up //
But I’m just trying not to hang on //
My self-deprecation //
I don’t think I’ll ever recover this //
But nothing calms my nerves //
And sleep just makes it worse //
I want to be someone I love //
But I want to give up completely //
Justify my existence //
But it’s never that easy //
It’s never that easy //
And if I disappear //
Would anyone be around to care //
And if I stop breathing //
Maybe then they’ll notice me //
If I disappear //
Would anyone be around to care //
And if I stop breathing // Maybe then they’ll notice me//
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5. |
July 30
04:01
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I want to know what you think about //
When there’s no one around //
To keep your mind away from //
The place it goes when you’re alone //
Do you stare into space and justify //
Every single choice that you’ve made //
Or is it easy enough to // Brush it all off //
And think how could anything really be your fault //
‘Cuz I’ve been trying to break my analytical code //
And bring back the person I used to know //
And systematically weed out //
All of the things //
That I hate the most //
Like how I can’t breathe when you’re not around //
If I could see inside my head and rip out all the parts that I hate //
Do you think I’d be whole again //
And not read in to everything that you do //
And every time that you say I guess I’ll see you when I see you. //
I guess I’ll see you when I see you//
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6. |
Death to Hospitality
04:22
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A white piece of granite sat by the tree//
It was unmarked but there was no doubting who was underneath//
I couldn’t help but stare, but couldn’t bear to see//
Because all around was dead grass, and brown and withered leaves//
Death to hospitality//
I’m unwelcoming to everyone//
Who I used to be//
I used to be scared of missing out on//
Almost everything//
So I never made plans for the things that I cared about the most//
And now I’m left out on my own//
Death to hospitality//
I’m unwelcoming to everyone//
Who I used to be//
Death to hospitality//
Because I can’t stand a single thing about//
Who I used to be//
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7. |
Basketball
04:01
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I was up all last night //
Trying my best to untie //
All of the knots in my stomach and on my tongue //
But I’m running in circles //
So I picked up my phone again //
To let the doubtfulness back in //
This can’t be it //
Is there really nothing more to me than //
Missing the point of moving on //
But I can’t help //
But think to myself//
How fucking miserable I was last year //
And now my friends all hate me //
Because I never want to go out //
I’ll drink alone inside my room //
I’ve got my coffee in one hand //
And a sly sense of humor to hide //
The insecurities I feel all the time //
This can’t be it //
Is there really nothing more to me than //
Missing the point of moving on //
But I can’t help myself//
But keep the thought in the back of my head//
How fucking miserable I was last year //
And I’m running in circles //
And I need to find my way out //
I’m running in circles //
And I need to find my way out //
I’m running in circles //
And I need to find my way out //
I’m running in circles //
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8. |
Lawn Games
03:18
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I’m always anxious //
I curl up on the couch and scream I hate this //
And I check my phone every minute //
So I don’t feel so alone //
Inside my one bedroom apartment //
I’d rather pass out on the concrete every night //
And I rip my hair out //
And I’ll lose my shit in a flooded bathroom //
Nothing works to put myself back together //
I’m just another sad excuse but I’ll just blame it on whatever comes to mind first //
Why do I exist when every single second’s so hard to deal with //
Call me out //
‘Cuz I’ve been lying through my teeth //
I’ll tell you what you want to hear so you’ll believe me //
I’m not alright I never was just to inconvenient to give a fuck about //
Why do I exist when every single second’s so hard to deal with //
Nothing works to put myself back together //
I’m just another sad excuse but I’ll just blame it on whatever comes to mind first //
Why do I exist when every single second’s so hard to deal with //
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9. |
Death II
01:39
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//
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10. |
Let's Get Cathartic
03:38
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I find myself sleeping in on days that should be //
Spent with friends outside or doing something good //
But I can’t wake up the shades have all been sewn shut //
And when I go downstairs everybody else is gone//
There’s something in the way that I just can’t get out of my head //
That’s the least bit addicting //
But lying to myself hasn’t seemed this easy //
In at least a couple years //
I want to get better//
Better than before //
So let’s get cathartic//
I don’t want to do this anymore //
Let’s get better than before //
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